As I was working out today I was watching Ellen. With the recent spikes of teen suicides lately, due to bullying, she has been on a kick of trying to inspire kids to be able to rise above what they've been going through! If you haven't seen the video, I highly suggest you watching it:
Ellen on Bullying
With all of this that has been happening, I can't help but think about what life was like when I was younger. Sure, we all were teased, but there are some of us who got more of the brunt than others. I remember my experience starting in kindergarten. I was at a daycare, a place where a kid is supposed to feel safe and feel welcome. Well I felt neither at this place. The owner had a daughter who harassed me to no extent. She did things that are beyond illegal, and I'm happy to say the woman lost her license. While yeah, she lost it, I STILL think about what Annie did to me (yup, I still remember her name, and her face, and if she walked into a room right now, I promise you, her face wouldn't look the same as when she got in!) She gave me a wound that no matter what I do, it will never leave me!!
With that being the start of my school career, we'll say my school career was less than desirable. I had very few friends in elementary school, I was a social outcast. People would make fun of anything I did, whether it was what I was wearing, or eating at lunch. Maybe it was how I ran or answering wrong questions. With how I felt, it led to a lot of emotional eating, WHICH, in turn led to a big weight gain.
Then I got into the dreaded middle school! LIFE...WAS....HELL!!!! I was a terrbile student, I was fat, ugly, gross, and I heard it every single day from SO many people! Yeah, I could name THEM too, but I won't! I remember so many times, coming home and never ever wanting to go back to school!! My first day of 8th grade, I remember coming off the bus bauling my eyes out, swearing I would never ever return!! Unfortunatly, I did!
Highschool, I found some friends, but again, there were so many times I had to walk down those long halls, by myself with people behind me, snickering and laughing and pointing! HIGH SCHOOL. Yeah, kids were just damn mean!!
Then college, this was meant to be a brand new start! FINALLY for the first time in my ENTIRE school career, I felt safe! I felt like I belonged!! I made some of my best friends, and I learned who I was! I learned that I was smart and people liked me! They were adults who knew how to treat others! It was amazing!
So basically, with all this rambling, what I'm tryin to say is, if you know someone who is being bullied, tell them it will be all right!! Life goes on, and the losers who were bullies are doing nothing in their lives, and we, the bullied, rise above it!
So to you bullies I had to deal with: THANK YOU!! Because of you I gained the confidence I needed and became a success in college! I have such a wonderful husband who loves me for everything I am and have to offer! I have the best family, and have 2 great dogs! Because of you, I have lost 70 pounds and continue to live MY dreams! I am going to be an Officer in the U.S. Army, and I get to see the world! And what are you doing? I'm betting still picking on the little guys! Well guys, have fun with that, I'm gonna go live a good life!! :)
Tuesday, October 5, 2010
Friday, September 17, 2010
Now what?
Now that the surgery is done, what am I going to do next? It's amazing how long roads must go on before you actually reach a goal! I gotta say, it sucks! So, until I reach the point of signing, there are things that keep me motivated, such as finding people who I can model myself as a leader after. So the next couple blogs are going to be about leaders, and how they're going to make ME a better officer!!
I think one of the best leaders, and one of my dad's personal heroes, is John Wooden. He was the head coach at UCLA, and here's how he ended up there:
"UCLA had actually been his second choice for a coaching position in 1948. He had also been pursued for the head coaching position at the University of Minnesota, and it was his and his wife's desire to remain in the Midwest. But inclement weather in Minnesota prevented Wooden from receiving the scheduled phone offer from the Golden Gophers. Thinking that they had lost interest, Wooden accepted the head coaching job with the Bruins instead. Officials from the University of Minnesota contacted Wooden right after he accepted the position at UCLA, but he declined their offer because he had given his word to the Bruins"
Well, coach Wooden was one of a kind. He took no slack from even his star players! He coached a lot of greats through his career, and one thing I think they all would say, was not only was he a coach, but he was a mentor. Both on and off the court the players respected him, what he thought, and what he did!
Here are some really great John Wooden quotes, and let the man speak for himself! Here's what I want to take with me from his Basketball court, to my Army:
- A coach is someone who can give correction without causing resentment.
- Be more concerned with your character than your reputation, because your character is what you really are, while your reputation is merely what others think you are.
- Consider the rights of others before your own feelings, and the feelings of others before your own rights.
- Don't let what you cannot do interfere with what you can do.
- Don't measure yourself by what you have accomplished, but by what you should have accomplished with your ability.
- If you're not making mistakes, then you're not doing anything. I'm positive that a doer makes mistakes.
- Success comes from knowing that you did your best to become the best that you are capable of becoming.
- Success is never final, failure is never fatal. It's courage that counts.
- Things turn out best for the people who make the best of the way things turn out.
and finally
- You can't live a perfect day without doing something for someone who will never be able to repay you.
I think one of the best leaders, and one of my dad's personal heroes, is John Wooden. He was the head coach at UCLA, and here's how he ended up there:
"UCLA had actually been his second choice for a coaching position in 1948. He had also been pursued for the head coaching position at the University of Minnesota, and it was his and his wife's desire to remain in the Midwest. But inclement weather in Minnesota prevented Wooden from receiving the scheduled phone offer from the Golden Gophers. Thinking that they had lost interest, Wooden accepted the head coaching job with the Bruins instead. Officials from the University of Minnesota contacted Wooden right after he accepted the position at UCLA, but he declined their offer because he had given his word to the Bruins"
Well, coach Wooden was one of a kind. He took no slack from even his star players! He coached a lot of greats through his career, and one thing I think they all would say, was not only was he a coach, but he was a mentor. Both on and off the court the players respected him, what he thought, and what he did!
Here are some really great John Wooden quotes, and let the man speak for himself! Here's what I want to take with me from his Basketball court, to my Army:
- A coach is someone who can give correction without causing resentment.
- Be more concerned with your character than your reputation, because your character is what you really are, while your reputation is merely what others think you are.
- Consider the rights of others before your own feelings, and the feelings of others before your own rights.
- Don't let what you cannot do interfere with what you can do.
- Don't measure yourself by what you have accomplished, but by what you should have accomplished with your ability.
- If you're not making mistakes, then you're not doing anything. I'm positive that a doer makes mistakes.
- Success comes from knowing that you did your best to become the best that you are capable of becoming.
- Success is never final, failure is never fatal. It's courage that counts.
- Things turn out best for the people who make the best of the way things turn out.
and finally
- You can't live a perfect day without doing something for someone who will never be able to repay you.
Thursday, September 16, 2010
Surgery completed
Well, so far so good!! I went into the office Tuesday morning and left mid afternoon. So...the procedure:
As I said, I went into the doc at 9:45 in the morning! I got in there, they took my weight and height. My blood pressure was high, so they gave me the happy drugs to try to get me to calm down!
So, eventually my blood pressure got down far enough, where they allowed to to proceed with the process! Well, the first thing that happened was they shot numbingness stuff in my lower stomach!! When I was numb, they cut a 4 little holes in the 4 corners of my abs. They first took a machine that looked like a long stick. All I could feel was the heat from it! Pretty much, the only other thing I felt on that part was it being moved around under my skin and above the muscle!! It was crazy! After that he took another long stick with a thick tube attached to the back of it! If you've ever gotten a tattoo, you know what the vibrating pen feels like. That's what this particular tube felt like. It was vibrating so fast, and as I looked up I could see the fat literally being sucked out of me, it was so COOL!! It was like this orangish color, mixed in with the red fluid numbing agent. Then they repeated it on my outer legs too. Between the two places they took out two really big tubes of fat!
Now it's time for the recovering period! I tell ya, this part is NOT fun! Imagine the worst bruising you have ever experienced, and times it by about 100!! Well first, I wasn't able to take any pain killers because every time I did, I threw up ANYTHING that was in my stomach. If there was nothing, dry heave-ho! Well, finally I was able to find something that I was able to take!! So, yesterday, I did absolutely nothing! I sat and watched more Ghost Whisperer as well as a lot of day time crap!
Today is another day better! I feel like I could actually go out and DO something...maybe! I must say though, while this is STILL a crazy emotional roller-coaster, I know this was the right decision! I know this is one of the final steps I NEEDED to take, before I make my final leap!
As I said, I went into the doc at 9:45 in the morning! I got in there, they took my weight and height. My blood pressure was high, so they gave me the happy drugs to try to get me to calm down!
So, eventually my blood pressure got down far enough, where they allowed to to proceed with the process! Well, the first thing that happened was they shot numbingness stuff in my lower stomach!! When I was numb, they cut a 4 little holes in the 4 corners of my abs. They first took a machine that looked like a long stick. All I could feel was the heat from it! Pretty much, the only other thing I felt on that part was it being moved around under my skin and above the muscle!! It was crazy! After that he took another long stick with a thick tube attached to the back of it! If you've ever gotten a tattoo, you know what the vibrating pen feels like. That's what this particular tube felt like. It was vibrating so fast, and as I looked up I could see the fat literally being sucked out of me, it was so COOL!! It was like this orangish color, mixed in with the red fluid numbing agent. Then they repeated it on my outer legs too. Between the two places they took out two really big tubes of fat!
Now it's time for the recovering period! I tell ya, this part is NOT fun! Imagine the worst bruising you have ever experienced, and times it by about 100!! Well first, I wasn't able to take any pain killers because every time I did, I threw up ANYTHING that was in my stomach. If there was nothing, dry heave-ho! Well, finally I was able to find something that I was able to take!! So, yesterday, I did absolutely nothing! I sat and watched more Ghost Whisperer as well as a lot of day time crap!
Today is another day better! I feel like I could actually go out and DO something...maybe! I must say though, while this is STILL a crazy emotional roller-coaster, I know this was the right decision! I know this is one of the final steps I NEEDED to take, before I make my final leap!
Saturday, September 11, 2010
3 more sleeps 'till life begins again
For the last year and a half, I've been workin' my butt off, quite literally. Well there are two parts of my body that don't ever want to budge, my lower abs and my outer thighs. I worked for over 2.5 months harder than I've worked before! My diet was perfect, my exercise was beyond strong. It included running 2-5 miles daily, working out with a trainer twice a week, and even attempting yoga!
When all was said and done, I was STUCK! My weight didn't go down a pound, I didn't lose a cm in circumference, my body was saying "Oh hells to the no girlfriend!!" I went to a doctor to see if they would be able to help, and I got nothing but a cold shoulder! Then I went to the skin rejuvenation clinic in Edina. After a very promising meeting, we set the date and it's quickly approaching!
I now officially only have 3 more sleeps until the surgery! This is going to be my life changing 7 hours!! It's a "simple" procedure, and I'll be on my feet the next day, back to exercising a week to a week and a half later! Ladies and gents, this (should) be my last step until signing my name on that dotted line!! I AM SO EXCITED!!! I'm not one to give up, so I like to think of this more as giving mother nature a boost! :)
Don't worry, I'll make sure to give you an update as soon as I can!! Thank you all SOO much for all your support this past year! It's gonna keep going, I know, but I could NEVER have done what I have without you!
When all was said and done, I was STUCK! My weight didn't go down a pound, I didn't lose a cm in circumference, my body was saying "Oh hells to the no girlfriend!!" I went to a doctor to see if they would be able to help, and I got nothing but a cold shoulder! Then I went to the skin rejuvenation clinic in Edina. After a very promising meeting, we set the date and it's quickly approaching!
I now officially only have 3 more sleeps until the surgery! This is going to be my life changing 7 hours!! It's a "simple" procedure, and I'll be on my feet the next day, back to exercising a week to a week and a half later! Ladies and gents, this (should) be my last step until signing my name on that dotted line!! I AM SO EXCITED!!! I'm not one to give up, so I like to think of this more as giving mother nature a boost! :)
Don't worry, I'll make sure to give you an update as soon as I can!! Thank you all SOO much for all your support this past year! It's gonna keep going, I know, but I could NEVER have done what I have without you!
Monday, September 6, 2010
I Still Love Lucy
*nothing about weight loss, just thought I'd share bits and parts of my life!*
Since I was a wee little one, there's one show that has always been there for me whenever I was sick, or needed a laugh, or really just wanted GOOD television episode. I Love Lucy never fails to make me laugh! However, before I Love Lucy happened, life was not always easy for Lucille Ball herself! She was rejected constantly saying she didn't have what it takes, she wasn't funny and that she would never make it in show business!
There was something about Lucy I admired. I think it was her constant persistence to get into Ricky's show, or maybe it was the fact that no matter how mad they got at each other, Lucy and Ricky always loved each other in the end! Yeah, I know how the real marriage ended, but that doesn't matter, Lucy and Ricky always have been, and always will be in love!
In many ways I see Colin and myself in Lucy and Ricky! No, Colin isn't a latin band leader, conga drum player, although, sometimes I wonder about his English! (Oh, I'm just kidding!) However, we bicker, a lot and we argue about finances! I'm always getting in his business and he thinks that he's really the man of the house! ;) However, at the end of the day, we're more in love than when it began!
I Love Lucy is now syndicated in over 80 countries around the world, and remains one of the most popular shows of all time! I've always loved Lucy, and I think I always will! Her ever stubbornness is a good way to live life if you ask me! The moral she teaches me show after show:
"when life says no, figure out a way to get in the show anyway!"
So that, my dear friends, is why I Love Lucy! Now here are a few clips to get you through until the next time YOU get to love Lucy:
And really, who can forget Vitameatavegamin?
"Speed it up!!"
I think the BEST episodes are the ones out in California:
A teary tribute to Lucy, and why we all loved her!
and finally: The series finale farewell:
Since I was a wee little one, there's one show that has always been there for me whenever I was sick, or needed a laugh, or really just wanted GOOD television episode. I Love Lucy never fails to make me laugh! However, before I Love Lucy happened, life was not always easy for Lucille Ball herself! She was rejected constantly saying she didn't have what it takes, she wasn't funny and that she would never make it in show business!
There was something about Lucy I admired. I think it was her constant persistence to get into Ricky's show, or maybe it was the fact that no matter how mad they got at each other, Lucy and Ricky always loved each other in the end! Yeah, I know how the real marriage ended, but that doesn't matter, Lucy and Ricky always have been, and always will be in love!
In many ways I see Colin and myself in Lucy and Ricky! No, Colin isn't a latin band leader, conga drum player, although, sometimes I wonder about his English! (Oh, I'm just kidding!) However, we bicker, a lot and we argue about finances! I'm always getting in his business and he thinks that he's really the man of the house! ;) However, at the end of the day, we're more in love than when it began!
I Love Lucy is now syndicated in over 80 countries around the world, and remains one of the most popular shows of all time! I've always loved Lucy, and I think I always will! Her ever stubbornness is a good way to live life if you ask me! The moral she teaches me show after show:
"when life says no, figure out a way to get in the show anyway!"
So that, my dear friends, is why I Love Lucy! Now here are a few clips to get you through until the next time YOU get to love Lucy:
And really, who can forget Vitameatavegamin?
"Speed it up!!"
I think the BEST episodes are the ones out in California:
A teary tribute to Lucy, and why we all loved her!
and finally: The series finale farewell:
Thursday, September 2, 2010
The beginning of the end...
As far back as I recall, I have had weight problems! In kindergarten I remember having a conversation with some friends, announcing the fact that I was 60 pounds! The average girl weighs about 46 pounds at that age. Anyway, so it's been a problem!
I've always been self conscious, but it's never been the biggest concern of mine. That is until I decided I wanted to join the military. For the last year and a half I've been working with an amazing trainer! My diet has been really good! (Minus the State Fair visit!) However, for the last couple month, my size, my weight, NOTHING has budged!! My spirits have been very low, and there have been several times just wanted to quit!!
There are only 2 parts of my body that haven't budged. My hips, and my lower abs! About a month ago I had the unfortunate meeting with a doctor who REALLY wanted to make me quit! He was an ass, he didn't care, and he was wearing a gold chain with a lot of chest hair...yeah, ew! He looked a little bit like a doctor pimp!
Well, finally today I didn't go back to the doctor, but I went to a "skin rejuvenation clinic." I've known the doctors for sometime, they go to our church, but the minute I walked in I felt very comfortable! Everyone was welcoming, the atmosphere was calm, and the couch was comfy :)!
We went back to the room, and doctor number one was wonderful! She took a look at my "trouble areas" and learned about ME. About my past. About what I wanted and needed! Doctor number two came in (her husband) and was the same way! They cared about me as a person, not if a law suite was going to be brought upon them, which is what pimp doctor thought the WHOLE time!
This procedure is unique and wonderful! It's like liposuction, however they use lasers, not knifes! They make a tiny incision where they stick a small tube. On this tube is a laser and it goes in almost a windshield wiper motion. It MELTS the fat! Once they go through the whole thing, they simply suck it out! Because they use a heated laser, the laser also works are a skin tightener. So when the fat comes out, the skin slowly tightens and returns to normal!
A lot fewer complications, no real anesthetics needed, and I'm up and walking the next day! I get to start exercising merely one week later and my diet can stay constant!! PLUS, it's more cost effective!
Having the opportunity to do this, really makes things feel like they're falling into place! This is the last step of what I really need to accomplish my goals! THE ONLY thing standing in my way are these spots, and now, FINALLY, after a year and a half of working out and dieting, my goals will be here!
Of course I have to wait a couple months before full recovery, but the second I get the okay, I'm in that recruiters office, signing my name on that dotted line...
HOOAH!!!!!!!!!!
Find out most about the clinic and procedure!!
I've always been self conscious, but it's never been the biggest concern of mine. That is until I decided I wanted to join the military. For the last year and a half I've been working with an amazing trainer! My diet has been really good! (Minus the State Fair visit!) However, for the last couple month, my size, my weight, NOTHING has budged!! My spirits have been very low, and there have been several times just wanted to quit!!
There are only 2 parts of my body that haven't budged. My hips, and my lower abs! About a month ago I had the unfortunate meeting with a doctor who REALLY wanted to make me quit! He was an ass, he didn't care, and he was wearing a gold chain with a lot of chest hair...yeah, ew! He looked a little bit like a doctor pimp!
Well, finally today I didn't go back to the doctor, but I went to a "skin rejuvenation clinic." I've known the doctors for sometime, they go to our church, but the minute I walked in I felt very comfortable! Everyone was welcoming, the atmosphere was calm, and the couch was comfy :)!
We went back to the room, and doctor number one was wonderful! She took a look at my "trouble areas" and learned about ME. About my past. About what I wanted and needed! Doctor number two came in (her husband) and was the same way! They cared about me as a person, not if a law suite was going to be brought upon them, which is what pimp doctor thought the WHOLE time!
This procedure is unique and wonderful! It's like liposuction, however they use lasers, not knifes! They make a tiny incision where they stick a small tube. On this tube is a laser and it goes in almost a windshield wiper motion. It MELTS the fat! Once they go through the whole thing, they simply suck it out! Because they use a heated laser, the laser also works are a skin tightener. So when the fat comes out, the skin slowly tightens and returns to normal!
A lot fewer complications, no real anesthetics needed, and I'm up and walking the next day! I get to start exercising merely one week later and my diet can stay constant!! PLUS, it's more cost effective!
Having the opportunity to do this, really makes things feel like they're falling into place! This is the last step of what I really need to accomplish my goals! THE ONLY thing standing in my way are these spots, and now, FINALLY, after a year and a half of working out and dieting, my goals will be here!
Of course I have to wait a couple months before full recovery, but the second I get the okay, I'm in that recruiters office, signing my name on that dotted line...
HOOAH!!!!!!!!!!
Find out most about the clinic and procedure!!
Wednesday, August 4, 2010
They're after me Lucky Charms
I'm not a little leprechaun I know, but I do believe in lucky charms!
So many times people (or Colin) call me crazy for tossing salt over my shoulder when I spill it, or never saying "Oh we've got this in the bag" for any sport even when ahead by 20 points! I always knock on wood to not jinx something or if my nose itches, I know someone is thinking about me! I believe all this, I don't just do it 'cus it's cute (which of course it is) but I do it because I REALLY do believe in that stuff.
Maybe call me weird, but these last couple days have proven that I should believe in that stuff! About last March I took off my jade Buddha. I wore him the whole year Colin was gone through my weight loss. Well, we saw what I did when Colin was gone! Well, I thought keeping my lucky Buddha in the car would suffice. Come March, things just kinda started going down hill!
About a week and a half ago I was driving in the car where Buddha was hanging from my rear view mirror. I made the decision that he needed to be with me again! Since March, I've gained weight back, Colin was never able to get his VA funding, having one car was becoming the biggest hassle ever, and work was giving me no hours!!
Well, in the week and a half he's been with me, Colin got his VA money PLUS another month of rent and bill pay in grant money from the county, found a car that was originally $50,000 got it for under $8000, I've been getting twice the hours at work, and as for weight loss, we'll just say stay tuned after Friday for those results!!
I don't know what makes this particular necklace so special. I don't know why it brings me the luck that it does, all I know is that it does and if I could, this necklace would never leave my neck! I'm a firm believer in fate and I know that I found this guy for a reason, and I am SO glad I did!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)