Conquering fears

Since I've started losing weight I've been getting almost all my clothes at Old Navy. It was a very safe place to shop! I knew my pant size and I was so very happy with it!  

 If you didn't know, we are going to be actually going on a Honeymoon, starting Tuesday the 2nd! While I am pumped for this, we are going to be going to a warmer climate!  We're actually going to be spending a whole week in Disney World!  You would think I wouldn't care what I look like there, but I don't want to look at myself 30 years from now and see these pictures like I see my wedding pictures. I hate my wedding pictures.  I don't like the way I look at all! 

Well, as I said, Old Navy has always been a safe shopping store for me! However, in the last month, I had yet to find anything that really fits, and it has been getting discouraging! Instead of looking at it from the point of view of "Oh, I'm getting so much smaller, the sizes are getting smaller and in between" I'm having flashbacks to last year, and the rest of my life!

Because of this, going into a clothing store scares me!!! No, it doesn't just scare me, it terrifies me! The varying in sizes makes me nervous.  You might think it sounds weird, but I am terrified to try on pants!!

Well, Colin and I went up to Duluth yesterday. Being there isn't a WHOLE lot to do in that city we decided to walk around Miller Hill Mall.  We walked into Maurice's. I found a few shirts that I really liked! Then, we walked around the store and there they were, jean shorts! I thought they were actually cute. I wanted to try them on so bad, but they were a size 9, meaning, more of the teenaged type clothing.  I stood there for 10 minutes looking at them, dreading going to try them on!  What if they didn't fit?! What if my weightloss isn't real?!  What if it was JUST Old Navy where I lost size? What if I didn't lose it according to any other store??

For 25 years my mind hasn't fit anything! Well, after debating, I grabbed those shorts, bolted over to the dressing room, and put them on!! What happened? THEY FIT!!!! Doing that one thing was one of the scariest things I have done! It was admitting to myself that I MAY have not really done what I thought I have.  However, I DID! I have achieved this weight loss, and I'm still going! I've lost all the inches!  I am really doing it, and I continue to do it!

Part of this journey is experiencing things I have never done before! Well, this my friends is one thing I never thought I would be able to do!


"Don't let the fear of the time it will take to accomplish something stand in the way of your doing it. The time will pass anyway; we might as well put that passing time to the best possible use."      Earl Nightingale